I like to believe in impossible things, and as a fan of Lewis Carroll, I aim to believe in at least six before breakfast. Uncorrupt judges, my life made into a movie starring at least one of Meryl Streep's daughters, free lunches, public demand producing a hilarious yet educational videogame, first contact, a worthy Eurovision song contest winner...my scope is boundless.
Of the first, uncorrupt judges. I cannot go into detail but a friend's future may hang in the balance based on a judges decision. This is not something I want to be flippant about. Suufice it to say that this began the thoughtstream that led me to think six impossible things.
It is easily possible that my life story will interest one of the Streep daughters. Especially if she spends any time being educated in the UK and learns some God-awful swear words which she needs to put into practise. And if Parminder Nagra hasn't used them all up on ER. So less than impossible, but no nearer to likely.
Free lunches are only reputedly impossible. I have had some. Good ones. With free Margaritas on the side. (A long while ago, but thank you Clint Mansell.)
The educational fun videogames I think are but a nanosecond away from becoming reality, especially as I commented about them on the Guardian website this morning. But I admit this was actually during, not before, breakfast. So that scrapes in by a hair's breadth.
First contact. Is it impossible if it may have already happened but due to a Government cover-up we are all sublimely unaware of it? I think this counts. And if my plot for The Answer sees the light of day as a movie, I can dispense with first contact and a whole barrel of other firsts, so believing in it is not such a stretch as it might seem.
Which leaves only the worthy Eurovision winner. Saved the best til last. This will not happen til Hell freezes over, and the Devil gets matching lilac leg warmers and fingerless gloves. So I can happily go on believing in it, impossibly, and keep Lewis Carroll chipper too.
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